Deccan Chronicle

Advice On Trust And Love For Couples

Deccan Chronicle. | DC Correspondent

Published on: June 6, 2023 | Updated on: June 6, 2023

Love and trust in relationships are the keys to maintaining long-lasting companionship

Trusting someone means having faith and confidence that they will not violate or hurt you, at least not intentionally.  Pixabay

Trusting someone means having faith and confidence that they will not violate or hurt you, at least not intentionally. Pixabay

Trust is synonymous with loyalty and security with your partner. According to psychologists and relationship coaches, to trust someone means to rely on your partner because you feel safe when they are around. Trusting someone means having faith and confidence that they will not violate or hurt you, at least not intentionally.

To trust your beloved also means that you can be emotionally vulnerable to your partner, allowing you to open up without requiring you to be defensive about yourself. You can be true to yourself and show your real side to your partner.

The Importance of Trust and Love in a Relationship

Love and trust go hand in hand, and each is incomplete without the other. While love is necessary, a healthy relationship is incomplete without trust. Trust in any relationship not only implies trusting the partner but also means trusting your own judgments and decisions and having faith in yourself.

To develop love and companionship, first, you need to build trust in each other. This belief and confidence in the partner make a relationship grow over the years. And this is true for any relationship, be it among couples, parents and kids, or friends. If you cannot trust your partner, you don't feel safe and secure when they are around.

While the importance of love is understandable, let’s understand the significance of the trust factor in a relationship. Here are some major reasons trust is a vital aspect of every relationship.

    It Heals the Hurts

It’s natural to get hurt in relationships, and minor conflicts are often blessings in disguise that solve some misunderstandings or serious relationship issues. Therefore, faith, love and trust in relationships are necessary to heal the hurt soul and cure any damage done. We can get hurt by unmet expectations and misunderstandings, but those issues need to be solved and healed, and the trust factor can make us forgive and come closer to each other.

    Trust Provides Reassurance

No matter how serious the conflicts might be, if you still have enough trust and belief in your partner, it will assure you that the relationship will survive. Trust and love can offer reassurance that a relationship will stand against all odds and overcome all challenges. No matter what, you two will stand for each other and enjoy a stable, long-term companionship.

    Love is Meaningless Without Trust

As mentioned earlier, love and trust are like inseparable friends. Trust is the foundation of any relationship, and love comes after. Trust is the key to developing love between each other, and this alone stays during difficult times. Your partner won’t leave even during the most challenging times if there is belief and trust in each other.

    Trust Can Overcome Hardships

When you have trust and faith in your partner, you know that they have their best interests at heart and that you are their priority. Whenever there are challenges and obstacles in your relationship, this trust factor will help you have complete faith that your relationship will come back stronger and withstand all difficulties.

    It Helps to Give Each Other Space

When you have faith and belief in your partner, you will never feel insecure around them. You will feel safe and secure every time you are with your partner. Trust allows both partners to give room to each other, allowing them to be in their own personal space and time without hesitation.

Spending some time alone or with friends and other family members gives partners room for self-growth and to perform other responsibilities. By trusting your partner, you don't feel suspicious when they are not around or spending time alone or with friends.

Signs Showing You Have Trust in Your Partner and Your Relationship

Following are some signs indicating your relationship is healthy, and both of you believe one another.

    You have open and healthy conversations.
    Both of you put your guard down and are not afraid to share your fears and secrets.
    You are on each other’s priority list; you put each other’s interests and needs first.
    You listen to each other’s thoughts, feelings, and wants actively.
    You make joint decisions by consulting each other and for the betterment of one another.
    Both partners maintain eye contact during conversations because you have nothing to hide.
    You admit mistakes honestly rather than covering them with explanations or excuses.
    You have good physical intimacy. It is not always having sex, but simple acts like a gentle kiss, hug, holding hands, and caressing or cuddling one another are the positive signs of a healthy relationship full of trust and bonding.
    You feel confident and comfortable around each other and can be your authentic selves.
    You both put effort into resolving conflict and disagreements in healthy ways.

Signs that Show You Lack Trust in Your Relationship

Trusting someone does not necessarily mean you believe your partner will be loyal to you and never cheat on you. It may also indicate other things, such as being able to put off your protective layer and share your heart's feelings, without having the fear of being vulnerable. If you notice the following signs and experience these feelings, then there are chances you may have lost trust in your partner.

    You struggle to let your wishes be known or find it difficult to ask for what you want.
    You feel it’s best to do everything yourself and take control.
    You find it difficult to let your guard down before your partner.
    You watch your partner’s social media activities secretly.
    You imagine the worst when your partner does not answer your call.
    You become suspicious whenever your partner receives a text.

Challenges We Face in Relationships

At times, we often have several doubts in our minds regarding our partners and relationships. We often start questioning whether a person is right for us and whether everything is going well. At other times, we may feel unsure of our spouse, which may occur due to misunderstandings.

As a result, we often start doubting our partners and their commitments to the relationship. This, in turn, provokes us to keep an eye on their activities, such as the people they are chatting or speaking to and the friends they are meeting. Finally, it causes us to lose faith and trust in our partners, and we start thinking they are lying or hiding something, even when they are innocent.

Relationships are difficult to maintain. When there is a lack of trust between them, every second spent with each other becomes toxic. A relationship without trust becomes dysfunctional and chaotic and does not grow or stay healthy in the long run. Therefore, developing trust in one another becomes necessary to keep toxicity and doubts at bay.

However, at times, one or both of the partners are at fault, which creates doubts in the mind of the other partner. The most challenging part of a relationship is often the difficulty in balancing one’s alone time and the time spent with one’s partner, friends, and family members.

Sometimes, it also becomes hard to find a harmonious way to handle all the responsibilities of our personal and professional lives. And as the relationship and commitment get more serious, the expectations and responsibilities start increasing, making it more challenging to handle everything smoothly.

This difficulty in meeting our partner’s expectations often gives rise to doubts, misunderstandings, and trust issues. Some of the major reasons why many relationships fail include:

    Lack of healthy communication
    Loss of intimacy
    Lack of emotional support
    Financial burdens
    Mistrust and loss of faith
    Difficulty coping with stress
    War of chores
    Taking each other for granted
    Boundary violations or extreme domination or possessiveness
    Difficulty balancing personal and couple expectations
    Physical or emotional infidelity
    Jealousy and possessiveness
    Lack of appreciation
    A shift in life goals
    Separation, breaking up, or divorce.

The above challenges finally lead to trust issues, thus impacting the long-term success of a relationship.

5 Tips on How to Boost Trust and Love in Your Relationship

Building trust is not an overnight thing. It takes time and patience and happens over time. We must build trust every day by putting in minor efforts daily and consistently. So, here are some concrete and practical ways to develop love and trust in relationships.

1.    Communicate Your Wants and Intentions Clearly

Although we are inclined towards thinking that our better half will understand our wants and interests even without telling them, this is not always true. It is not always possible for our spouse to realize every wish or interest that we have unless we communicate them clearly.

Your partner is not a mind reader, so you cannot expect them to understand your needs without ever telling them. Keep stating your intentions often and have clear communications. Effective communication can save a sinking relationship and also build trust and strong bonding between each other.

2.    Always Be Honest

Honesty and telling the truth at all times is the key to developing trust in your relationship. While this suggestion almost sounds like a no-brainer, you will be surprised to know how even good-hearted people resort to lying to their partners.

Lying comes when one has something to hide, especially when they have done something wrong. At other times, many people lie to avoid conflicts because their partners are strict or rigid about something. Abstain from telling lies unless it’s for a good cause, such as not hurting your partner.

And there’s a difference between white lies and black lies. While the former is said to please another person and is innocent in nature, not causing any harm to anybody, the latter can get quite serious. Black lies are told for some personal gain and are universally condemned or even considered damaging to the person it is told to. People tell black lies when they have something serious to hide, such as during physical or emotional infidelity.

3.    Forgive Each Other

Learn to forget and forgive and move on in your relationship after a conflict or disagreement. When your partner admits their mistake and asks for forgiveness, it’s best to put down your protective barrier and let go of all the harsh feelings towards them. Don't hold on to your grudges and past fights.

Release all such hard feelings as it would also impact your mental peace. Let go, accept their mistakes, and forgive. It’s better to live in the current moment than hold on to past grudges and hurt both parties.

4.    Admit Your Mistakes

In extension to the above, try to admit your mistakes honestly whenever you feel you have done something wrong. Instead of making up excuses or giving illogical explanations for your faults, just say that magical word "sorry". Admit that you have made a mistake and are willing to work on that.

While it’s easy to make mistakes, owning them and taking full responsibility for them is tough. Admitting mistakes will reflect your strong personality and prove you are a real human being. Instead of covering for your mistakes and making the situation messier, admit your faults. Repentance only shows that you are willing to develop mutual respect and trust.

5.    Keep Your Promises

If you tend to make promises that are meaningless and are never meant to be kept, then don't make such hollow promises at all. Whenever you make a promise, make a complete effort to keep it. Stick to your word rather than making a promise solely to keep your partner happy. It is better not to give false hopes to satisfy your partner’s emotions temporarily because breaking promises are costlier in ways you may not even imagine. The hurt inflicted by some broken promises is hard to mend at times, thus breaching trust and creating gaps in the relationship.

Key Takeaways

To conclude, the above tips to develop love and trust in relationships should help boost your companionship and bonding with your beloved. Ensure there is transparency and honesty in your companionship and support each other despite all odds.

Instead of judging each other’s actions and holding on to past grudges, be empathetic towards each other and understand and fulfill their interest and needs. Such little effort will definitely save a sinking relationship and keep it afloat for the long term.

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