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Agony Ashley: Men are not the centre of the universe

In this column, Ashley Tellis will answer Questions about relationships, sexual health and concerns about LOST population in India.

Q As a bisexual woman, I constantly meet jerk men who want a threesome and think it’s really cool that I am bisexual because they seem to believe it will give them access to more women. How do I explain to them that my liking women does not involve them at all?
Anamika, Bangalore

Men think they are the centre of the universe, Anamika. They think all the world’s sexuality revolves around them. They think lesbians are just waiting for the right man and have not met him yet. Hence the tired scenario in porn in which two women making out or having sex are joined by a man who changes it all into something about him. The moment a guy asks questions like the ones you talk about, dump him and move on. Or insist that he date men too. It may not leave you with any men at all but that may not be a bad thing AT ALL.

Q How do I enlarge my penis?
Zakir, Hyderabad

The penis is not a plant. It does not keep growing with regular watering. And this is not a column about biological possibilities or impossibilities. Be happy with your size. And remember it is not the size of the gun but the power of the shot that counts. And that power is an art not brute force.

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