Year 2016 has been most eventful for me. I have become much bolder, and grew a lot as a person. To grow, you need good and bad experiences. Back then, when I had expressed an opinion about the beef festival in the college I teach — Sree Kerala Varma — I had no idea it would become so big. When it became such a big issue, I had felt all alone, with many even close to me asking why I should express my opinions on such political matters. That it was not my area. They said that out of care, seeing the number of threats I was getting.
I may not have done that if it was not the college I taught at. But it was my students who were in trouble. And I felt it was an unnecessary issue. It was a stage when democracy seemed to take a backseat with people being told what to eat, wear, write or think. It was not a problem in our college alone.
I had a few thousand followers back then, for writing totally harmless personal anecdotes. But now there are so many people who notice and discuss my posts, some of them waiting to see if there’ll be another controversy. But I have no regrets. I would still act the same. Perhaps I would face it much better now.
There was a fear of losing the job that I got on merit, teaching where I had studied. But surprising even me, the management had stood with me and said the college is not a temple. I will never disrespect any community. I am not an atheist. But I don’t want my faith to make life difficult for others. This is a secular college. A temple coming to such a campus, I felt, is dangerous.
All this has not changed my life or my ways. But how people look at me has. It’s embarrassing sometimes because expressing an opinion needn’t bring you so much attention. But I am happy to get so many letters, 10 to 20 everyday even now. Even those who disagree with my political take say they enjoy the books I wrote. Perhaps this incident has made my books more popular. I am someone who had to pay to publish the first of my books — Pranayakathayude Manifesto. I remember how the first set of books printed had 18 pages missing. When I told the publisher this, he said no one would come in search of a new author or know the pages are missing. But I didn’t allow those books to be on sale, I didn’t want to cheat my readers. They must be rotting in some godown. But now my book Kunnolamundallo Boothakalakkulir has gone into its 15th edition. I am not saying this arrogantly. It’s just that I could raise my head at places I had to keep it down.
Lover of books
Deepa Nisanth had once attended the Sharjah International Book Fest as part of the audience. This year she went there as a guest, and spoke of the days she used to work there as an accountant, getting chastised one day for reading a book at office.
