Love is a complex set of emotions associated with a phenomenal feeling that we all want to quench our desire with; because the reward is infinite. It is that one force of nature and the most enchanting valence for which we all incline to get engage in committing initial layers of romance, positive care, passion and mutual respect for each other. Most of us attempt to elucidate the selfless in love due to the willingness to prioritise another’s well-being or happiness above our own. True love is when you develop a deeper level of understanding and have an open communication with each other.
However, the course of love never did run smoothly because many at times and most of us may end up with a “one-sided relationship” and perceive that the other person should also feel the same towards us.
So what is one-sided Relationship?
A one-sided relationship is a state of delusion, of own self-created fantasy realm where you self-create and surround yourself in a language of fascinating imagination. When you are in a relationship or just in love, you want to be nurtured or care and thus, end up projecting those feelings into the other person believing that the other person is looking the same in you. And that’s what creates one-sided relationships. Happens mainly with teenagers or adults who are in their own world or in a fantasy world of delusions where the other person is taking care of you.
Let us look at certain signs we need to be aware about.
“The Sign of Denial” – You are into a denial state when you have an assumption that the person is looking at you or talking about you while you both are communicating with each other, but at the same time the body language of the person is not your league and staring at someone less, some other women or your friend. Or sometimes, what happens is the person indicates that they love you but there is a high degree of denial from their end due to some prevailing circumstance.
“Want to Break the Platonic Foundation”– When you fell in love with your friend and want to get romantically interested in him but you have no idea that the person feels the same way for you or you know very well that he does not possess the same mirrored gesture that you are seeking for and avoid to hold the gaze in a specific direction.
You are an “Attention Seeker”- You’ll probably develop a hidden behaviour of spending a lot of time trying to seek the attention of the person you love by practising a creative form of things. Also, sometimes one becomes jealous, submissive or aggressive and unable to control their behaviour; for instance, doing certain things like hurting themselves so that the other person can come and speak to them. You also try to do exactly what they want i.e. you play the “pleasing drive” by heavily discounting the degree of your own needs.
“The Blame game”- When the person plays the victim; “Look what have you done to me” and thus, a lot of emotional drama emerges and played by the person without the other person being aware of it. They blame either self or others.
“Checking Social Media presence” – You keep on checking the status or the last seen of the person in WhatsApp or facebook and stalk the person.
*Disclaimer: The article has been contributed by Dr Paras, Life-leadership coach, Founder, The Matrrix. The opinions expressed are the personal opinion of the author. The facts and views appearing in this article do not reflect the views of Deccan Chronicle and Deccan Chronicle does not assume any responsibility and liability for the same.