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I went through clinical depression: Laxmi Raai

Actress Laxmi Raai, who's back on the sets shooting for her upcoming film, talks about losing her father last year

Actress Laxmi Raai is extremely pleased to be back on the sets on Monday in Hyderabad. She is shooting for her first film after the pandemic, a female-centric, revenge drama directed by Ramana.

Recounting her experience of getting back on the sets after the disruption caused by COVID-19 and the subsequent lockdowns, Laxmi says, “It’s like a déjà vu feeling as if I am starting my first film. Suddenly, I feel like a newcomer being in front of the camera after such a long gap.”

Then chuckling at her excitement of being back on sets, Laxmi reveals about the role she’d enact in the movie. “I play a woman who tries to take up issues such as rape, casting couch and being misled in various spheres of life, all of which women today face. The character I play tries to seek justice for them,” says Laxmi.

The struggles of 2020

Though she is back on the sets, portraying strong roles in reel-life, Laxmi has had to endure a lot in her real life especially in the past year. The actress had lost her father in November 2020 to cancer.

“I don’t have fond memories of 2020, and I can’t even remember how the year passed. I realised the true challenges of life only after my dad’s demise. I had no choice but to deal with it. Life put me in such a scenario where I began discovering who I am,” the Julie 2 actress elucidates.

All said and done, the actress admits, she gained strength from her own experiences, which according to her, cannot be taught unless life presents you with a situation that makes you tough. However, the struggles she went through to get on the other side of it were real.

“It’s a very personal and very hard issue for me to cope with. I tried my level best to save my dad. It was my toughest phase in life. When you know you can’t save the person who created you, all you can do is hope and pray. The stress levels were so much that I went through clinical depression,” the actress reveals.

So despite the several offers that came her way last, the actress chose not to take any of them. “I was not myself or in the right frame of mind to work,” she adds.

It took months for Laxmi to get back to doing normal things and start working.
“The fact that I am the youngest child made it even more difficult for me to deal with the situation. I was there with my father till the end and served him to my fullest so that I don’t have any regrets that I missed out on not doing something for him,” she shares.

When the going got tough…

Speaking about the phase where she was detached from the world, the actress who acted in the 2019-horror film Where Is the Venkatalakshmi says she began staying away from everything and everyone.

“I know work gives you strength and keeps you going, but even for work, you need to be in the right frame of mind — be it personal or professional. When my mind is not stable, I cannot connect or talk to people, but I have my own ways of recovery to deal with it,” she expresses.

Apparently, during that tough time, Laxmi had to shoot for a couple of projects that were in the last leg, which she did with great difficulty. Stating she’s not a ‘practical person’ the actress tells us it becomes naturally difficult for her to deal with any issues that are practical in life.

“I can’t act in real life too, right?” she asks even as she remembers how several of her friends were trying to find her whereabouts. “I did not open up about my father’s issue to my friends so not many knew about it. Also, I am someone who wants to spread positivity. Moreover, all day long, every day, all my phone calls involved doctors, medical bills and check-ups. My life had changed completely then.”

Laxmi further states that her focus was only on her dad’s health. However, later her friends got to know about what she was going through and managed to reach out to her, she tells us.

( Source : Deccan Chronicle. )
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