Comedian Kiku Sharda was arrested for mimicking Dera Chief Gurmeet Ram Rahim ‘Insan’. The Supreme court is considering a ban on websites that feature sardar jokes, AIB faced a PIL after their roast and Vir Das had police turning up at his gig in the capital. Comedians write open letters talking about the most untouchable topics for humour in India.
Dear No One,
This is not an Open Letter. I loathe Open Letters. If Open Letters could be arrested — I would assuredly endorse it. And, going by the mood in India, there will certainly be someone who worships Open Letters and is deeply offended that I impersonated their deity, a Natraj Ballpoint Pen — which still has less colour than a certain Mr Gurmeet. Is India secular? In one week, we’ve had:
A cricket captain get an arrest warrant through Hindus. A man in UP get death threats from Muslims in Bengal. A comedian jailed — twice — for impersonating a “religious” leader. We’re not secular, We’re basically religion nazis.
For a lot of people saying that the law i.e. Section 295 is archaic and gives the police too much power. Much like a Sulabh Shauchalaya — you’re full of s***. Cases were filed under the same law against Gurmeet Ram Rahim, MS Dhoni, Owaisi(s), Amit Shah and others. Remember when all four of them spent a week in jail? No, right? Because — the implementation of the law depends on the power of the person its targeted against. The hand of law is long but, a celebrity’s hand is longer and, a powerful celebrity’s hand is longer than the Supreme Court.
Kiku Sharda is not part of a political party. There is no Kapil Sharma Sena or Comedy Nights Janata Party or even a Babaji Ka Thullu religious cult and what that means is simple: Kiku is more unimportant than a man’s nipple; an ironic comparison given his proclivity to dress up so regularly as a man-lady on CNWK. He’s basically more dispensable than a non-cross-dresser on CNWK.
Comedians and artistes in general are powerless in India. The fortunate problem lies in our general lack of violence. Nobody fears an artiste because we fight with our thoughts and not with physical harm. And, therein lies the problem. In India — if you’re not a threat to anyone, you’re at threat from anyone.
So unless artistes band together with a Salman Khan Sena — that threatens to run over anyone that protests against creative expression — we’re easy meat.
P.S. The driver did it.
To all you religious nutjobs out there, every time you file a case against someone for offending your God(s) — you’re implying your God is weak. Your God is Parthiv Patel. Because, if your God is so insubstantial that he/she/it needs a dumbass like you to fight his/her/its battles — then, your God needs to hit the gym.
Possibly start kickboxing. If this all-knowing powerful entity is so easily harmed by the mere words of another human being — maybe they’re not powerful at all? Gandalf has more powers and is more seeped in reality than your God. God doesn’t need you as a lawyer. But, your self-inflated ego definitely does. And, your politics do. Stop fooling yourself into claiming this is about spirituality.
— Comedian Sorabh Pant is the founder of East India Comedy, author of Under Delhi and not exactly a big fan of being arrested. You can file suits against Sorabh nevertheless, on Twitter @hankypanty.
Evolution of humour
Homo sapiens have taken their sense of humour for granted and sadly, have stopped its evolution. It is the right of any citizen of a democratic country to comment, make fun of or mimic for personal or public pleasure any person or situation he or she does not agree with or finds funny nonetheless.
However, it is the right of any citizen of a democratic country to get offended as well. To criticise someone for having a poor sense of humour or for the lack of it is like criticising someone for having a sight or hearing disability. I, for one, am of the opinion that poor sense of humour or total absence of it should be declared a disability and people with such disabilities should be certified and identified. Nobody should make fun of them or the things they believe in — be it their political or religious views.
Anything out of the ordinary according to the definition of ordinary in vogue will grab the attention of everyone but not necessarily be commented upon by everyone. It needs special kind of people who are not afraid of making fools of themselves in public and are ready for all kinds of consequences. And this brings us to identifying and certifying all the comedians, political and religious commentators and artists at random under the disabilities act as well.
These people can’t help themselves but speak their mind which is incidentally the mind of the majority but only comedians have the guts to do it and are paid for it too.
Not every person is made of the same stuff. Every individual is made of the circumstances he or she lives in, the kind of education he or she has received and which strata of society they hail from. The right to get offended is a legitimate demand to have and there is a kind of pressing urgency attached to it.
So the question remains that why are the number of incidents increasing where comedians, artists, cartoonists and people in general are commenting on religious and political figures? What is the need of this kind of humour? And why are more and more people finding it funny?
— Maheep Singh, stand-up comic
Dear India
Before I begin writing this letter let me tell you — —— —— (those were expletives that have been censored by the newspaper). What has happened to us? We’ve gone from democracy to democrazy. (I’m not proud of that joke)
Every single time anyone dares to make a joke there will be 50 people waiting to take offence. We have spawned this new generation of blog writing, FIR filing and pointless outraging people that we really need to control.
Every comedian in this country is not afraid of being arrested but is merely just confused as what will be taken out of context next. This is how I see the future of our country:
Me: Hey could I have one black coffee please? Person with political affiliation: HOW DARE YOU CALL FOR BLACK? THIS IS RACIST? WE ARE BROWN! NO DESHBHAKTI? YOU ARE ANTI NATIONALIST. GO TO PAKISTAN.
I think more than Yolo and Selfie the one term we all Indians need to use is CYT which stands for ‘Calm Your T***.’ (Obviously women will take offence to the word t***, spiritual gurus will take offence to Calm and anyone who uses Facebook will take offence to ‘Your’ because duh it’s spelt as UR)
It’s high time we take a backseat and realise that by getting angry at a joke and making impulsive decisions we are becoming part of a bigger joke. Other countries have discussions about us like:
Europe: I just showed naked people on TV.
America: One dude just compared Trump to Hitler.
India: No more Santa Banta jokes.
Europe: LOL India you are crazy.
America: Come on give me a hug.
India: HUG IS AGAINST OUR CULTURE. NO JOKES AT ALL.
We are slowly becoming that one country that is so unstable that it gets called to parties only because other people want to make fun of us. The world is not laughing with us, they are laughing at us. It’s high time we develop a sense of humour and stop being afraid of our flaws. Someone makes fun of us? Let’s take it with a pinch of salt. We Indians are used to putting salt in every dish, we can easily put some in our lives.
Here’s the truth — you can’t stop jokes. You can’t stop people from commenting. You can’t cut down on freedom of speech. What you can do is just learn to CYT and stop over-reacting. We are a country, not an Ekta Kapoor TV soap.
For once… let’s grow up as a nation. Let’s come together and stop this intolerance… Come on India… I believe in you.
Sincerely,
Sahil Shah
PS: Don’t send me to jail because I said we need to end intolerance. Just CYT.
— Sahil Shah is the co-founder of East India Comedy
OBITUARY SHANTI PATH
Unto devotees…. shanti
Unto the fanatics… shanti
Unto the traditionalists… shanti
Unto the ignorant… shanti
Unto the intolerant… shanti
Unto the narrow-minded… shanti
Unto the politically
motivated… shanti
Unto the forever offended… shantiiiiiiii
Peace unto all
Shanti shanti shantiiiiii…
Dear all, We are sad to announce the untimely death of a dear friend and loyal companion. It was good. Always wanted to make people smile. Didn’t want anyone to feel excluded ever. Treated everyone as an equal irrespective of caste, creed, colour, gender or size. It was bold and courageous and died honourably in the line of duty. It will be dearly missed.
We wonder why it had to die instead of all the wrong and bad that exists. I guess as they say, “ooparwaala” always calls the good back early. So please join us in praying for it to be left in peace. R.I.P. Humour
— Neeti Palta, stand-up comic
The creeps are winning
Comedian’s job has always been to call bullshit and make people laugh. Sometimes we die, sometimes we kill, but never do we have to go to jail. That is something new and #IncredibleIndia has managed to take the worldwide lead in terms of tolerating the humourless. It’s unfair to say ‘Indians have no sense of humour’.
B**** please! Would we be able to tolerate the state of a single government run entity if we didn’t. The fact is we, the people, joke all day long about everything. From the moment we wake up and fall into an open manhole until we go to bed at night, if we have a bed, grateful that we made it through another day despite our politicians and bureaucrats’ best efforts.
We live in a country where actress and feminist hell-raiser Sunny Leone was verbally groped by a man called Bhupendra Chaubey. On primetime TV. And nothing has happened to him. Nor will it because, to quote Mulayam Singh Yadav, “boys will be boys”.
When you cut across religion, social and economic class, or even geographic lines, the group that gets left behind is always women. Controlled by fear in her home and on the street the female of our species is as much at risk today as she was 100 years ago.
Mother India my a**. This is a Daddy State all the way and the straight Hindu man is always in-charge — if you deviate from this combination of traits, make no mistake, you are a minority. Unless you are rich — because let’s be real — money trumps everything. Including basic decency. Our country is in pain. The creeps are winning. People in power are using loopholes in our archaic judicial system to screw the rest of us. And unless we all stand together we won’t change a damn thing.
— Radhika vaz stand-up comedian and author of Unladylike, A Memoir
