Reality bites in relationships

Youngsters talk about the new age challenges they face when it comes to maintaining the right balance with their partners.

Update: 2019-12-09 18:30 GMT
Sangeetha Amarnath

Have you ever felt the pressure of doing everything right in a relationship? Well, stop! Take a moment and let’s try to analyse where these “right” things to do in a relationship originated from? Famous romantic novels, movies and classic fairytales have managed to paint a rosy picture of relationships. This in turn has set the bar high for relationships to function accordingly. However, couples are now breaking all these norms and are having a rational approach to life. We delve deeper to understand what’s going on!

A relationship is always known as a tricky business, especially when singles make a big deal about freedom and the will to do what they want. But, young couples today have founds various ways to stay in the relationship and still have their space.

Elaborating the same Ronit Pai a software engineer shares his mantra in his relationship. He says, “There’s just so much pressure once we are in a relationship. But, the key is to let yourself lose. When I first met my girlfriend I wanted to woo her on our first date so I met her with flowers and chocolates and took her to a swanky restaurant when at that time was way out of my league. But, once I got to the place I found out that she was allergic to pollen and didn’t fancy sweets. The world has changed and now I believe the biggest gift you can give your girlfriend is a relationship based on understanding and not the norms set by movies, they’re only good for entertainment.”

Sowmya Raj an assistant professor at a famous institution in the city says nowadays there is equal responsibilities in a relationship because most of them come from broken families. She shares, “My husband and I both had a difficult childhood, watching our parents fight on a daily basis was how we grew. So we individually decided never to repeat the mistakes our parents made. I don’t see the need to tell my husband everything that happens in my life and he is fine with it. And once in a while I even pamper him with a surprise meal. So the common notion that the guy should pamper the girl is long gone.”

Sexual intercourse in a relationship is also one thing that most couples have had problems with, because the term is a taboo in our society and once you have the option to perform the act there is often too much tension. Speaking about his experience is David Anthony a sales and marketing manager at a leading retail firm. He says, “We all dream of the big day and there’s so much planning that goes behind it. My partner and I decided to take it slow and not plan the day. Making love is just a passionate phenomenon that helps in the propagation of the human species and must be a peaceful journey.”

Sociologist and relationships expert Sangeetha Amarnath explains the psyche of young couples today. She says, “We now live in an era where young couples are focusing on individual growth and wish to be in a relationship only for the emotional support and there is no scope for fantasy. Couples have understood the ground rule that when there is physical and mental satisfaction, they are likely to perform better in their career. Hence, going to sleep without resolving a fight or just moving on together is not a bad option for them after all.”

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