Hitting the right note with people

Kochi: “Music is the language of the spirit” — Khalil Gibran

Expression of love, freedom, angst. Music is all this and more for the youth of today. For most of them, what they listen to is a reflection of their identity and they make it a point to share it with friends on the social media. So it comes as little surprise that people with similar tastes in music tend to bond better. That is what a study that analysed the relation between music, identity and relationships also concluded.

“It’s near impossible to be in a relationship if you detest the kind of music your partner listens to. Especially if both of you are avid music lovers. It’s just not something you can sweep under the carpet. Music becomes a thorn in a relationship when one partner feels under constant pressure to like what his/her partner listens to despite having little interest in the same,” says Anjitha, an MBBS student from Mangalore.

Music is a great conversation starter. There’s also no better way to start a relationship than by asking her/him out on a date to a music band’s concert you both enjoy listening to. The study revealed that most people chose their ‘kind of music’ during their adolescence as a means of expression and to measure and judge a person by the music they listened to. Actor Priya Anand says, “As a kid, you want to be cool so it’s natural to want to be associated with what popular kids are listening to. When you are in college you tend to explore and find your own sound. Not just in terms of music but also as a person. Music should never be a source of conflict in a bond. One must also not limit themselves to a certain kind of music.”

Music and relationships have always been closely interconnected. It has been revealed that most people spoke about music when trying to strike up a conversation with someone they found attractive because more than anything one’s taste of music shed light on their personality.

Playback singer Chinmayi shares this insight: “The kind of music people listen to is usually a reflection of the kind of music their peers listen to. When you are in a relationship with someone practising music then one makes the choice of accepting the kind of music their partner is into. It’s one of the adjustments a spouse or partner makes. If they enjoy the music, however, the question of ‘adjustment’ doesn’t come in.