There was a time when a “rape scene” was mandatory in Hindi films. They were seen as both a form of titillation as well as a general lesson for women. And if you were female you had to live through the horror of hoots and whistles from the audience as you squirmed through the ordeal. Possibly, it was equally disgusting for some men as well. The screams and the blouse tearing were par for the course as well as standard dialogues about a woman’s “respect” being “looted”. Luckily the rape scene is no longer a must. And even “item numbers” have disappeared from Hindi films, even if gender equality in cinema is still a pipe dream.
Since the gangrape and death of a young woman in New Delhi in December 2012, we have changed the way we discuss rape and crimes against women in India. There were calls for sensitivity and for action from all quarters of society. But even then, the mention of the presence of “patriarchy” angered some men and a few women. It is as if we believe that since several national Constitutions promise gender equality, patriarchy in any form no longer exists. Indeed.
But as you start thinking about it, you realise that the constant presence of patriarchy in our lives has nothing to do with governments or laws or the police. It has to do with what is accepted as normal around you.
After the Delhi 2012 rape case, there were cries for justice and for changing mindsets. Bollywood was the target of much anger and people from the film industry itself took out candlelight vigils in the star-studded Juhu area of Mumbai in support of the victim. They also appeared on television asking for Bollywood to change. But one of those worthies who also wrote a heart-rending poem about the dire state of women in India when he appeared on TV wearing his head of advertising agency hat, had quite a different song to sing.
Advertising could do nothing about the way women were portrayed on television because advertising did what the market demanded, the worthy gentleman sternly pronounced with no sense of irony leaving no room for compromise. And the market, apparently, prefers women to be boxed into historical stereotypes. Talk about changing mindsets! There is no point limiting discussions about patriarchy to the khap panchayats of north India therefore. The khap panchayats, as is evident, are trapped in social and historical time warps. But the enlightened men and sometimes women of urban India are also in the same traps.
A famous feminist, who has now seemingly changed tack after inspiring generations of Indian women has declared that khaps serve a purpose as does the practice of dowry. A Mumbai police commissioner blamed sex education in schools for the rising rate of crimes against women. A female Chief Minister suggested that women not venture out of home after dark if they wanted to be safe. Another Chief Minister was accused of stalking a young woman and it apparently bothered few except for his legions of fans who thought he was being unfairly targeted.
These people are not villagers bound by archaic laws struggling to understand sociological changes that threaten their precious status quo. They are urban creatures in positions of power and importance but they have evidently been unable to shake off their inherent or incipient notions of patriarchy. Perhaps, after all these years, it remains the default position for some. For instance, in all the discussions about gender equality and women’s rights, domestic violence still makes us squeamish even though research shows it is rampant across social lines. Domestic abuse and marital rape are also discussed sotto voce because the family structure is seen as more important than the plight or the rights of the victim.
It is not just women who suffer at the hands of patriarchy. Men do too both those who are trapped by it and those who want to choose a different or a contradictory line of thinking for themselves. An integral part of patriarchy is the status quo and that means no questions should or can be asked.The explanation given by the Supreme Court as to why homosexuality was re-criminalised when it upheld Section 377 of the Indian Penal Code after it was struck down by the Delhi high court as unfair and unconstitutional is a case in point.
Vague references to Indian culture and social acceptance are nothing more than a genuflection at the altar of archaic systems and that is what patriarchy thrives on. And without a doubt, homosexuality like all gender politics threatens the rigid and the prejudiced who cannot envisage a life that does not fit their own ideas. At the same time, there are more women breaking out of various parental, societal and historical strangleholds. There are also women who are nurtured by parents and society to achieve and surpass their potential. Gender sex selection at birth is slowly being seen as immoral, unethical and perhaps even unacceptable. Again, research has shown that sex selection for foetuses is more rampant in urban, literal and better-off areas.
“Education” is an understandable goal and indeed it is imperative but by themselves neither education nor money can guarantee good sense. However, the days of the strident feminism that began with the Suffragettes and flowered in the 1970s are over. Governments have made their moves with laws and more laws. Some might even argue that laws like 498A, where the notion of presumption of innocence is set aside, are unfair to men and therefore patriarchal in their own way. The bigger struggle is now amongst the people. A United Nations ad campaign last year used the popular search engine Google to prove how sexism rules the Internet. Using the search parameters of “women shouldn’t”, prompts included “women shouldn’t have rights” or “votes” or “women shouldn’t work”. Even assuming the Internet is populated by a larger proportion of loons than the “normal” world, this unashamed sexism is still disquieting. It is these insidious forms of patriarchy which are hardest to fight.
A young woman studying management spoke the other day about the problems she has at home. She lives on the far outskirts of Mumbai and has a long commute to college. Classes end at 6 pm and she reaches home about 9 pm. Her father fights with her every night about coming home that late. “He has lived his whole life in Mumbai,” she points out, “Surely he knows how long it takes to travel the distance?”
As long as women like her stick to their goals no matter what, the struggle becomes worth it. And so the old system is indeed rightly threatened.
