Simple matters

DR. N SUCHARITA
Published Jan 3, 2014, 4:47 pm IST
Updated Mar 19, 2019, 4:26 am IST
Friendship in school can be simple but for making grown-up’s friendship work you need to have rules for maintaining it.

I am a 19-year-old guy. I used to be casual friends with this girl in my class in the middle school and recently got in touch with her again through Facebook. For the past few weeks we have been chatting every day. She is fun to talk to and seems to be enjoying the conversation too, because she uses exclamation marks and smileys and gives back fairly long responses! I want to ask her for her number to chat over Whatsapp because it’s a lot easier to use than Facebook chat. If I ask for her number, will she think I’m trying to hit on her? I honestly just want to talk as friends and don’t want this to be taken the wrong way! Please help.

If you want to use Whatsapp instead of Facebook chat you just have to tell her stating the convenience of using such technology. Do not presume that if you ask for her number she might think you are hitting on her. Friendship in school can be simple but for making grown-up’s friendship work you need to have rules for maintaining it.

 

Make sure you invest quality time to be good friends, willingness to be true in friendship and accepting the others shortcomings also. Never cross the lines and be romantic or give her mixed messages that will lead to confusion. Remember friendship for fun simply means time pass to feel good about yourself.

There is this guy I work with. Unlike the other men in my office, he makes intense eye contact while I speak with him. Almost as though he’s trying to read my mind or something. I’ve never felt a conversation like this. Like I said he’s the only one that does it out of all the guys. What does this mean?

 

Are you thinking this guy to be some psychic? Check what you are assuming from this behaviour. In fact, what you are doing is mind reading. In mind reading a person believes that they know what others are thinking. In your situation, you are wondering if he is indulging in mapping your thoughts.

When would you make such intense eye contact with others? When someone is making intense eye contact when you are talking, it could mostly mean having genuine interest in the conversation. Put yourself mentally in his place and do the same. This would probably help you to figure out reasons for why he is doing it.

 

 

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