Love no longer seems to be enough to make a marriage last. Today financial security seems to be a must for couples to enjoy a happily-ever-after ending because we live in practical times.
The young, thinking individuals of modern India are no longer just led by the heart. Along with focusing on one’s career to negotiating one’s standing in society, marriage too has become a matter of clever calculation.
With an increasing number of marriages falling apart because of money-related issues, it comes as no surprise that the union of two hearts is now but a transaction of respect, privilege and finances. In fact social commentators believe it is essential to talk about money before saying ‘I do’.
This idea of discussing ‘money’ before embarking on holy matrimony shouldn’t be put down to materialism. An undisputable necessity, discussing finances, is about security, independence and comfort that the couple can seek from the union.
Couple’s counsellor Vijay Nagaswami, says, “It is important to have fiscal transparency in a relationship. When a couple has shared goals, it is important to discuss the resources available.”
Indeed, in these times the resources — in the form of property, investment or inheritance — are vital to the fate of a marriage. In fact, with women earning on par with men, if not more, money is a crucial deciding factor for many.
Says actor and TV host Anu Hasan, “Money has always been an important aspect of life and, therefore, an important aspect of marriage too. These days, it is quite common for women to be practical when it comes to finances. Having separate accounts for earnings and a joint account for expenses is the way to go.”
Well-respected senior advocate Nalini Chidambaram comments, “This is an age of consumerism. Expenses are high and nobody is satisfied with the ordinary. Expensive clothes, holidays abroad and high living are what define the youth of today.
” Talking about why it is essential for families to discuss money before marriage, she says, “Marriage is like any other contract. And, when the best-written contracts are breached, it is important to ensure that one’s interests are protected in a marriage.
No one always goes by what was promised or agreed upon.” In a scenario where families continue to demand and accept dowry surreptitiously, this becomes especially important.
However, while certain families continue the practice of dowry — overtly or covertly, what becomes extremely evident is that there is no shame in talking money. Popular psychiatrist Harish Shetty believes, “Gone are the days of simple living and high thinking. Financial safety is a necessity that most are not willing to ignore.
And in a marriage, ‘infrastructure’ and the ‘accessories’ that come along with it are of consequence. Needs of women have changed and the idea of a love marriage has been redefined. It’s the product that is most relevant today.”
