KOCHI: Find everything you always wanted to know about sex, but were afraid to ask. Kochiites will get a golden opportunity to raise their questions about the taboo subject and remove their misgivings this week-end. Mithrakulam, a collective of social activists, on Desabhimani Road at Kaloor, is organising a meeting on Saturday and Sunday to discuss the topic and find answers so that an ideal approach to sex is evolved in society. This comes at a time when Kerala grapples with the sensitive issue in schools, colleges and even in the streets. It may be recalled that the hugging incident in a school in Thiruvananthapuram had turned into a major moral issue.
“We are not inviting anyone to the event. We have a page on Facebook and so far we have identified 30 people interested in discussing issues ranging from human rights to sex. Anyone with a genuine and logical opinion, for or against, is welcome. Our society now is in a state of flux and many people are directionless and we undertake this exercise to find a proper direction for society and its people,” said Anil Jose, co-ordinator of the Human Wellness Study Centre that is organising the meeting.
He said that the informal monthly discussions held so far would come up in the shape of a scientific sex education handbook. There are many points being finalised, including a human rights charter based on sexual justice. “Whether marriage and sex have to be separated? What is the definition of morality? Can one escape from the responsibility of women being used as consumer goods, irrespective of their age even from two to 90 years? Can religion escape from it? Will you take up the responsibility of educating your society for an enjoyable and healthy sex life?” are some of the pertinent questions to be debated.
The group also would discuss if legalising sex work in India will be a solution. “Do you support separating sex from marriage ? What is your opinion about a new definition for morality? Do you have an opinion that women have to be discriminated? Or do you agree that the priests are cheating us using the name of gods? These are some of the questions in the air,” says Anil Jose. Commenting on the gathering, film director Vidhu Vincent told DC that such open discussions should be welcomed. “A lot of people are grappling with the issue of sex. They are caught in the intricacies related to the subject. The present-day morality on the one side scares a lot while we are yet to have an ideal morality. Teenagers do not know it while those handling teenagers like teachers are dumbstruck when issues like teenage pregnancy crops up. We are yet to have a proper sex education in schools or colleges,” said Vidhu Vincent.
Responding to the development, feminist and writer Dr A.K. Jayasree said that Kerala society was still a closed one and not willing to discuss sex openly. “We are living in a society consisting of monogamous heterosexual families where females are still not earners in a major way. The control of females over families and society is still low. We do not encourage dating by girls and if a girl breaks up with a boy and then starts friendship with another which ends up in a marriage, then that girl is portrayed in a bad light. Marriage is a market and economics dominates these affairs, including family. The spontaneous urge of a woman for sex is never respected. There is no healthy space for sex and is mostly portrayed as a means for procreation. Open discussions on the subject should be initiated so that a meaningful transformation is possible,” Jayasree said.
