“My mother has an OCD. She even wants to arrange my marriage,” said Paritosh Das, a working professional in Mumbai. The joke received loud cheer by a bunch of young singles in the city who can probably relate to Paritosh’s predicament.
They have after all, gathered to avoid falling prey to the arranged marriage set up, or as they see it, a search for not the right life partner, but the right son or daughter-in-law. And in a quest to avoid the conventional matrimonial communities, these youngsters have signed up for a more experimental style of meeting singles in the city. The motive however, is established at the outset —a serious relationship.
Varsha Agnihotri Vadhyar, co-founder of Footloose No More, a new-age marriage website says it is meant for the urban, educated single who doesn’t believe in arranged marriage, but is looking for a life partner. The idea dawned on her after a moment of intervention when a friend told her that it was the end of the road.
“My brother Abhishek and I were both single and in our 30s. We thought that there are probably others like us and we need to bring all these people together. So we started a Facebook page for singles and within two weeks, we had 250 members! So we had to make it a closed group and start screening its members,” says Varsha.
What started as an FB page is now a full-fledged website with more than 2,500 members. Unlike conventional matrimonial websites that divide its members on the basis of caste or religion, this one encourages people to join interest-based groups and events.
“We organise treks, sports events, photography events, karaoke nights and the likes. A particular favourite is the creative evenings where people who like to sing, play an instrument or do stand-up comedy come and put out their talent. If you don’t want to do that, you can just watch,” adds Varsha, who herself met her husband during one of the evenings hosted by Footloose.
A similar venture, Floh, aims at connecting urban singles for marriage. “We’re clear at the outset that it’s not a dating website. The focus is on a serious relationship,” says founder Siddharth Mangraham. In order to make the environment highly interactive, Floh organises some classic Floh event such as single malt evenings, sailing events, vintage car rallies etc apart from a few customised evenings such as ‘Table for six'.
“The latter is where we handpick the people who we think will hit it off well (on the basis of their backgrounds) and reserve a table for them at a nice restaurant. We have seen lunches that start at 1pm and go on till 5 pm — and these are people who have met for the first time. The point is put people in a safe and interactive environment because we believe that you’re most attractive when you’re yourself.”
Floh today has its presence in five countries and has screened close to 20,000 applicants. Screening is an important aspect of these sites to keep a check on the quality of applicants. At Footloose, the applications are accepted only once the founders have personally met them. In fact, failure to show up at three consecutive events in the same city as the applicant could lead to ousting from the forum.
“We’re not about hiding behind Internet walls. There are a zillion dating websites where you can register as ‘Bubblygirl49’ and put up a flower as your profile picture. We are not one of them,” adds Varsha.
Monica Choudhary who met her spouse on a similar platform called Mix and Mingle, says the platforms are perfect for those seeking a serious relationship. “Once you’re out of college, there is a slim chance of you meeting a life partner.
These platforms bring together people from different backgrounds who you would never have met otherwise. I am in advertising and my husband is an engineer. We met at Mix and Mingle during a cocktail evening and just hit it off. We’ve been married for three years now.”
Most of these websites have seen about 40-45 couples getting hitched on record and estimate that there’d be many more off record. May be it’s time to play your own cupid?
